The fullness of eternal life

Yesterday Ben & I went on the normal routine to check our mail.

We got some tax information, credit card offers and one envelope from St. Anthony's Central Hospital.

Both of our hearts dropped when we saw the envelope.

Just seeing the name of the place that we received our prenatal care brought back memories.

Fear was also present as we opened the envelope, it might another bill from the d&c or it might be information regarding my health.

Shockingly, it was none of the above.

It was as follows:

We invite you, your family, and friends to join with others in a shared memorial service to celebrate the life of Baby Edwards'

and others who have been called to the fullness of eternal life.

Thursday, February 17

7:00 pm

Chapel (First Floor)

Immediately tears swelled in my eyes and I saw sadness slowly control my husbands face.

Although we had done our own memorial for our babies,

 we still cannot turn down this offer to share with others the pain of losing little ones.

So we will be there, rehashing our pain a bit, which helps us not forget our three musketeers.

So if you are around and would like to be a  part of this, you are more than welcome to join.

After I read this invitation, I went back to our cozy little apartment and began to write a few things and this is all I could seem to write about:

Everyday I wonder.

I wonder what their faces look like.

I wonder about their laughs, cries and coos.

I wonder about the sparkle in their eyes.

I wonder what games they are playing together in their beautiful world.

I wonder if they are best friends.

I wonder if they ever feel my love from this lonely planet.

I wonder if Jesus has given them names for me and if they are the names that appear in my dreams.

I wonder how old they will be when we are all reunited.

I wonder what their hugs & kisses will feel like.

I wonder so often about you.

I miss you three with every moment of every day.

I cannot wait to end this wondering and finally hold you all in my arms and say your names with my very own breath and hear you respond with "I love you mom."